Pressure Points: Breaking The Mental Rules
This is the third article in the Pressure Points series. This series is designed to offer mental strategies and tools to help you build the skill of performing under pressure. If you missed the first two articles (& tips), check out Pressure Points: A Series on Tips for Training to Play Under Pressure and Pressure Points: Facing Your Fear of Failure.
As previously discussed, there are three common reasons why athletes often fail under pressure (Preston, 2023). The first article in this series covered why we fail under pressure when we’re outcome-focused and provided a tip to help you work on mental zooming. The second article discussed the influence of the fear of failure and planning for obstacles to help. In this article, we will focus on a third reason you may fail under pressure: You’re creating rules for yourself.
What do I mean by that? Have you ever told yourself “I have to…,” “I need to…,” or “I should have…” in the moment? If you answered yes, then you have just created a rule for yourself and could be creating more anxiety around a situation than you need.
What Is The Big Deal About A Rule?
If you look at the dictionary definition, a rule is something you accept as a principle or instruction that tells you how something should be done and what you can and cannot do (Cambridge, 2025). Why do rules exist? Well, if you think about any daily life situation, rules exist to provide safety, fairness, and a sense of order.
Many people don’t like rules, and others thrive within a set of rules. Rules have a distinct purpose for how we function in everyday life, but what is their function for us mentally when it comes to performance?
Mental rules you set for yourself can be useful depending on how flexible you’re willing to be with the ones you set. For example, if you set a rule that you “have to be laser-focused here,” that can be motivating and set yourself up to remove distractions in that moment.
However, mental rules can become an issue if you’re too rigid. Let’s say you’re trying to unwind and have some fun on vacation. If you stay rigid on your rule of “I have to be laser-focused,” you may exhaust yourself and miss out on relaxation and the fun of the moment.
We want to think about when we can stretch (or be flexible) with the rules we create (Doucette, 2023). If we are not flexible or we create unnecessary rules for ourselves, it can create pressure that we don’t need. You want to learn how to perform under pressure you can’t control versus adding pressure for yourself.
Tackling Your Rules
The first step is to become aware of what psychological rules you use. Think back to specific pressure situations you’ve been in on the field. Have you ever been up to bat with the bases loaded (or on the rubber) and told yourself, “I have to get a hit right now,” or “I have to strike this batter out here?”
If you answered yes, then that is a rule you’ve created for yourself. Other variations of rules may be replacing “have to” with “must.” If you’re not sure if you create this type of rule, try saying out loud what you are thinking during a situation. This will help you clearly connect your thoughts.
Now that you understand a little more about creating rules and what those can do mentally, try reframing your self-talk to the action you want to perform. For example, in a bases-loaded at-bat, try telling yourself what you will do or want to do. And be specific for the moment.
For example, “I will hit the ball to the right side.” This is called self-talk that is action-focused and task-specific, and can help you stay focused on what you can do in the moment instead of restricting yourself to two options.
Lastly, it can be helpful to think through the worst-case scenario of what could happen if you don’t follow your rule. If you find yourself saying, “I have to get a hit here,” think about that for a minute. Is it you HAVE to get a hit or you WANT to get a hit? What would happen if you didn’t get a hit with bases-loaded? Take a moment to think through the worst thing that could happen.
Now, ask yourself, “Can I handle it?” if that worst-case scenario happens. This doesn’t mean it would feel good. If you strike out or don’t get a hit in that bases-loaded situation, you may feel down, but in the big picture of the game, can you handle that? The majority of the time, your answer will be “Yes!” Yes, you can handle that worst-case scenario. Now that you know you can handle the very worst outcome, the pressure of the moment minimizes, and the situation is as big as it should be.
Now go out there and seek out those pressure moments!
Dr. Megan Buning is a Certified Mental Performance Consultant (C.M.P.C.) with over a decade of experience training the mental game.
References
Cambridge. (2025). Rule. The Cambridge Dictionary.
Doucette, D. (2023, July 19). How to relax your own rules. PSYCHE.